As the Drivel Starved Nation now knows, Fred West won this years Sh!t Bunny Award–not for making his Entertainment Center, but for living with it.

He has received his award with no shame.  Here are a couple of  pics;





On a personal note Fred, if you don’t clean up your work bench you may end up with the evil Sh!t Bunny Twin–that bench top is too messy for my body.

Now, let it be known that when Chris Schwarz convinced me that I needed a blog (bunch of crap), I swore it would be the antithesis of the mean spirited baloney found everywhere else on the sewer net. (Sweeping generalizations are credible, yes/no?)

The picture below was supplied by Fred West and he is proudly listing Peter Franks as a collaborator.  Between the two of them, they believe Fred’s Entertainment Center can be saved by festooning the face with surplus Bridge City knobs;



Let it further be known that;

FESTOONING NEVER WORKS!   EVER. But if it did, it would only work with Bridge City knobs.


Lastly, here is the CRITERIA for winning the next Sh!t Bunny Award;

1. You have to have the cojones to nominate YOURSELF.

2. Everybody has made a crappy piece and for vanity reasons never owned up. NOW is the time.

3. Do you want others repeating your disastrous designs and crappy work?

4. Didn’t think so.

Send me a pic if the camera lens doesn’t break. I will do the rest.  I have learned over the years that pointing at a piece and saying “That SUCKS” hurts feelings.

Trust me, this is a great learning tool.

Lastly again, earlier this year I had Salmonella. Lost 18 pounds in 3 days. After seeing the festoon job above, I have lost 6 pounds in the last ten minutes.

Gotta go.

-John

PS: Fred/Peter; speaking on behalf of the Drivel Starved Nation, your festooning sucks.

Last week we took a break from cleaning out the warehouse so we could ship our new CS-12 Combination Squares–they really came out great. This run was a complete sellout (actually we are short a few because of scratches in the black chrome–how do you spell “BLEM’?). We hope to begin another run later this year and if you would like to be notified when,click here and at the bottom of the page click “Notify Me”.

These knobs (we only have a couple of hundred) can be used for lots of pull applications, including things such as bi-fold doors, large drawers or as slingshot ammunition. (Did I really say that?)



Here are the details;

Diameter: 25.3 mm (.996″)

Height: 15.3 mm (.595″)

Internal Threads: #1/4-28

Thread Depth: 12 mm (.475″)

Details: Solid brass with radial knurl

Cost: $14.95 for set of six.

Shipping: FREE

Question: From the picture it looks like they are slightly tarnished-can I get an additional discount?
Answer: No. Chuck the knob in your portable drill and polish with steel wool or Scotch Brite. It doesn’t take but a few seconds.

Question: That incredibly easy to read black ruler in the picture…are those in stock?
Answer: Yes!


Question: Will these bring down a charging bull moose?
Answer: Sure David. Better have some backups too.


How? 1-800-253-3332

Or? sales@bridgecitytools.com (if we have your CC info on file, just tell us how many sets you would like.)

While supplies last.

-John

PS: This Saturday I am speaking at the IDSA Annual Conference which happens to be in Portland. I am thinking about showing slides of Fred’s Entertainment Center if it looks like people are starting to doze off… good idea yes/no?

This is just a quick update to inform those of you have been patiently waiting for your CS12v2, they are all in house, inspected and will be at the warehouse tomorrow. We believe this is our best combination square–solid stainless steel and comes with both an 18″ and 12″ blade. The run is completely sold out so we are taking names for the next batch here–scroll down and click “Add to Favorites”, this gets your name on a list to be notified when we make them again.

I had lunch with Joe Felzman last week (Joe has been shooting my work for over 30 years!) and like always, we had lots of laughs and some terrific food. I thought you might enjoy some of his most recent efforts below.







If you have a few moments, take a peek at his work–stunning is an understatement.

And, if you are looking to add an image or two to your portfolio, you won’t find a better photographer–mention Bridge City and Joe will double his rates. Actually, you will be pleasantly surprised!

Best-

John

One sure way to avoid winning the infamous Sh!t Bunny Award is to use tasty hardware–like the knobs below!



Recently unearthed in our warehouse conversion, these small brass knobs have many practical uses, some of which are obscure. For example;

1. Offer a handful to your neighbor as payment for his land adjacent to your property. ( This has worked in the past.)  Then go buy a bigger lawn mower.

2. Next time you are pulled over for a speeding ticket, offer a handful to the officer explaining that the knobs were made from recycled bullet casings gathered at the Police Academy firing range. (We are guessing the ticket will be waived…)

3. Arrange a dozen or so in a circle on your driveway. Make note of the shadows. Do this each day for 23 years (or any other prime number) and you will soon learn how to tell time and be spot on when asked, “What season is it?” . Best of all: goodbye watch battery!

Or, you can use them for tool chest drawer pulls, or small pulls of any kind… surely you must have some ideas yourself–yes/no?

Here are the details;
Diameter: 11.9mm (.470″)
Height: 8.6 mm (.340″)
Internal Threads: #10-32
Thread Depth: 6.5mm (.256″)
Details: Solid brass, straight knurl
Cost: $12.95 for set of eight.
Shipping: FREE

Question: From the picture it looks like they are slightly tarnished-can I get an additional discount?
Answer: No. Chuck the knob in your portable drill and polish with steel wool or Scotch Brite. It doesn’t take but a few seconds.

Question: That incredibly easy to read black ruler in the picture…are those in stock?
Answer: Yes!


Question: Is there a limit of 10,000 sets per customer?
Answer: For the knobs yes. The rulers, no.


Question: Is this deal on your website?
Answer: No. It is a blog special while supplies last.

How? 1-800-253-3332

Or? sales@bridgecitytools.com (if we have your CC info on file, just tell us how many sets you would like.)

While supplies last.

-John, your knob shill and Tool Potentate all in one!

I knew this day was coming.

After much internal consternation (not really) we are finally able to award the Sh!t Bunny Award to Fred West’s Entertainment Center.

Before anybody fills a diaper here, Fred did not make this entertainment center–he inherited it from his ex-wife. Nice.

Fred, here is your award:






At this point you are probably asking yourself, “What deserves this award, and how do I avoid being a recipient?”  Good question. There is no identifiable criteria for this award, we just know the winners when we seem them.

Let us all take a look at Fred’s Entertainment Center (once you win the Sh!t Bunny award, your project if forever a proper noun-FYI).

Brace yourself;




This piece, by way of this Totally Awesome and Worthless Blog, is now famous, as in Louis XIV famous. Beyond belief isn’t it?

When Fred learned he had won the Sh!t Bunny Award, we talked about the certain possibility that somebody would want to buy this, to which he replied;

“As far as someone buying this, I cannot in a million years conceive of somebody that stupid. However, should someone want it, as long as they picked up the freight it would be theirs.”

Not only is Fred a gracious Sh!t Bunny recipient, he is generous too. The piece obviously will require no crating or packaging of any kind.  How cool is that?

But wait! There is more!











Back from the bathroom yet?

So here we are, and Fred has decided “enough is enough” — he has promised your favorite Tool Potentate that he is going to make a BRAND NEW ENTERTAINMENT CENTER!

Here’s where you can help!

Chime in with entertainment center ideas and pics (if possible) so Fred can start his idea bank. For those of you who don’t know what an idea bank is, well, it is a bunch of ideas that incubate until you decide on your next step–which is not the step that leads out into the shop.

Now if you want to pile on and dissect this piece further in the spirit of having fun, Fred is emotionally unattached to this piece so pile on.

My thoughts?

As far as entertainment centers go, it is rather entertaining.

–John

Today we are continuing the remodel of our warehouse to accommodate  our new video studio. When we moved a bunch of cardboard boxes we found a shelf system stuffed with parts-some of which I think might be of interest to you. Personally, it makes me mad.

These are excellent drawer pulls and can be used for a myriad of purposes.  1/4-28 fasteners can be ordered from McMaster-Carr (this company should run the country…simply amazing.)

Here’s a pic of the the solid brass knobs infilled with cocobolo;



Here are the details;

Diameter: 21.5mm (.848″)

Height: 12.25mm (.483″)

Internal Threads: 1/4 x 28

Thread Length: 10mm (.396″)

Details: Beautiful Radial Knurl

Cost: $12.95  for set of four

Shipping: Free

Will the wood be similar in color tone? Yes, to the best of our ability.

Is there a limit of 10,000 sets per customer? Yes, STRICTLY ENFORCED–don’t bother begging.

Is this deal on your website? No. It is a blog special while supplies last.

How? 1-800-253-3332

Or? sales@bridgecitytools.com (if we have your CC info on file, just tell us how many sets you would like.)

-John

Thanks to all who helped us unload our 27 year supply of Cocobolo and Ebony shorts.

While perusing through some old stuff, on yet ANOTHER RAINY DAY in Portland, I came across this image of a small chest front I made in the 1970’s—and oh how I wish that decade was a typo…

This small  Cocobolo draw pin effectively uses the sap as a strong visual element on a plain, straight grained walnut drop face chest. It is about 5 inches long. From a design standpoint, it begs to be removed, examined and replaced.   Sometimes sapwood can be very powerful and other times a complete disaster and contrived. So be careful with sapwood.  The design was inspired by a feather I found while on a walk.

What you cannot see is the reverse curve–the draw pin is inserted rotated 90 degrees to what you see here and then rolled downward to seal the lid to the body. This keeps one from scratching the crap out of the front if it were straight.  Lastly, since most box type projects tend to be boringly symmetrical, a little asymmetry can be a welcome contrast.



The hole has the visual function of inviting removal.

The female it engages is also a very small piece of cocobolo.

Just something to ponder when you need ideas.

Now go make something worthy of the space it occupies!

–John

Attention All Members of the Drivel Starved Nation ! (this includes YOU and anybody else who reads this totally worthless blog);

Have a Great 4th of July!

Lot’s of stuff going on here–from none other than John, your tool Potentate;

Finally assembly of our new stainless steel 18″ (and 12″) combination squares is happening as I peck away feeding this insatiable blog–which when you think about it is about as enjoyable as your neighbors muffler-less car…

Oh, back to combination squares–they are gorgeous. Yes, accurate too. We don’t know our final tally yet but we should have a few extra for those of you who procrastinate. Shipping will commence within the next 10 days or so.

Parts are coming in for the Jointmaker Pro v2 (and the upgrade kits), no promises (on delivery dates) but it is moving along. And there is a major cool surprise too!

CT-17 underway too!

The special limited edition HP-7 solid stainless steel shoulder plane is in “chips flying” stage. Should be done by the beginning of football season. There are six out of the fifty remaining–FYI.

In addition, we are working on LOTS of new stuff–not as fast as anyone would like, but hey, money is tight and we have accordingly retooled our  R & D department. Here’ s a pic of our newest staff member hard at work–


Sometime in the next two weeks we are going to begin the pre-order process for the “The Tool You Have to Have Now!” And if you don’t know you have to have it, you soon will. Why? Well it’s under $100 for starters. But wait, there is more…here’s the completely unnecessary back story;

The KM-1 Kerfmaker (The Tool You Want Real Bad!), has to be the hottest selling tool in the woodworking sector right now. How do I know? Well, I don’t.

Now as most of you know, we almost sold enough KM-1’s for me to buy Hawaii as my private residence. Ended up being about $400 short. (I offered a couple of billion and they countered with a couple of billion plus $400. No thanks.) I have Iceland in my sights now…

The Kerfmaker allows you to make grooves and bridles by gauging the stock width. No measuring. No mistakes. No brainer–and yes, although we are in the anti-inventory business, we have KM-1’s in stock. But…

…in the real world of woodworking, it is easier to size a tenon to a mortise than a mortise to a tenon and of course we know this and now you do too. And what good is knowledge if it doesn’t change history?

So consider this YOUR last call to make history. The pic below shows the “almost final” form of the TM-1 (it’s on the right). It will gauge mortise widths from 1/8″ up to two inches and it will measure mortise lengths up to 2″ IF the mortise is wider than 1/2″.



Since you will be forking over your hard earned cash for this amazing little device (which by the way, will completely eliminate the sloppy joinery you have come know) is the capacity of this tool satisfactory for your needs?  Speak up or else.

–Muffler Out

“A Potpourri of Diospyros Insularis”… has to be one of the most interesting assembly of consonants and vowels I have ever strung together. I just love this job…

Last week we unleashed our three decade old accumulation of cocobolo shorts (I know, not the best syntax…) upon you, the DSN. (drivel starved nation). I am pleased to announce this material will all be gone tomorrow! How cool is that?

This is cooler…

Today, underneath a 300 pound flat of cocobolo trims, I unearthed a sealed box of Diospyros Insularis, aka; Macassar Ebony. These are child pieces from vacuum dried parent stock and honestly, I don’t remember what we made out of this material. The pic below is what five pounds looks like and is representative of what you will receive. Maybe we have 100 pounds of the stuff.



Details:

Five pounds.
$35
Freight included (USA ground only)
First come, first served.
sales@bridgecitytools.com
800-253-3332

This material is likely best suited for turned knobs or other small turnings. Then again, maybe you have a better idea. (No, this is not a bunch of end-checked worthless (s)crap. FYI.)

So, are you wondering what we are going to do with our new found warehouse space? The new BCTW video studio will call this space home.

There are too many windows to make the kind of videos I would like to make but it should work well for tool shoots.

–John

FROM MY 4TH GRADE REPORT CARD:
“John doesn’t seem to apply himself and when he does, he is almost always inappropriately amused by his misguided sense of humor.”

For 27 years we have used dalbergia retusa (aka Cocobolo) as the primary wood in our tools.

Interestingly, during most of the ’90’s we (Bridge City) were participants in a sustainable yield test program only to learn that Cocobolo is not a sustainable yield timber.  This was one of the reasons that led to the new sculptural aesthetic now found in our products. And although we still own some lumber, we have accumulated three decades of shorts and trims–this material, in my eyes was always going to be used someday by somebody.  Hey, that day is here! And you could be that somebody! Admit it–you always wanted to be a somebody…

Prior to announcing our exclusive special to those of you who should be doing something more important than following the worthless drivel on this blog, a word about boiling water in a vacuum…

As you SHOULD KNOW, water boils at 212 degrees F. at sea level. As you lower atmospheric pressure, the water boils at lower temperatures and it is possible to boil water at room temperature (no, it is not 212 degrees while boiling, it is the temperature of your room…almost) in a partial vacuum.

The reason I bring this up is that you need to learn something here. What might that be you say? Thanks for asking!

All of our cocobolo has been vacuum kiln dried. This means that the water was boiled out of the stock (at around 90 degrees F.) which dramatically reduces end checking (if you have ever had chapped lips you understand end checking….). This means our three decades of trims are good for something…in your shop.

Tool handles. Furniture pulls. Knives. Pens. Plugs. Chop sticks… I am sure you can think of a few too.

We have pre-boxed all this material into ten pound units and we think you need to act fast before we post this on our website.  The picture below is representative of what you will receive when you steal this material from us. Nothing is over 16″ long. Some of it is thin. Some fat. Some smooth. Some not. Some can be turned. Some can’t. None of it is junk.



As a loyal follower of the drivel in this worthless blog, you will get first crack at a really nice ten pound box that you have no control over the contents. No whining or complaining. And if we thought you would whine or complain, we wouldn’t be doing this.

Ten pounds. $35. Free Shipping (no, not overnight, ground USA only)

How?

sales@bridgecitytools.com

If we have your credit card on file, just tell us how many boxes you desire and we will do the rest.

Limit 10,000 boxes per customer. (Sorry).

Or, you can call 1-800-253-3332 to find out how hard it is raining here.

–John